How To Deal With Rejection

how to deal with rejection

A few weeks ago, I was convinced that my surname was Rejection, because I was getting rejected left, right and centre.

So whilst I may be over dramatising a little, it did seem to be a week of constant emails saying ‘oh we’ve decided to go in another direction’ and ‘oh you’re just not what we’re looking for’ or the worst kind of rejection- silence.

My rejection was all work based, which is kind of part and parcel of my job as a full-time blogger, but boy did it really knock me for six.

I’m not the most confident of people, sometimes I can take things a little to heart, and a few rejections had me dramatically proclaiming to Henry, that I was packing it all in as I was clearly ‘terrible at my job.’

Fast forward a few days, and the drama queen has left the building, but I was surprised how those rejections affected me and made me realise that I’d been holding on to some other rejections I’d received over the past few months.

After a few chats with different people, I had a more positive mindset and well I’m feeling much better now thankfully. I thought that I’d write a post all about how I tried to change my mindset, and how I’m trying to learn from these rejections.

I guess as you’re reading this, you may be wanting to know the answer to this too, let me first of all tell you, that everyone gets rejected at some point.

I know that the likes of social media makes it think that everyone is going round smashing life, but I promise you that’s not always true. Not everyone posts about the rejections and bad days, but just because they don’t post about them doesn’t mean they don’t happen.

  1. Try To Not Take It Personally

So first things first, back away from the taking it personal train. As soon as I got those rejection emails about the jobs I was SO excited about, I spiralled into a ‘I’m terrible at my job’ ‘I’m so useless’ thought train… when in fact those rejections probably had very little to do with me. I mean sure they could have, but those rejections could have been down to logistics, budget, literally anything could have stopped those jobs going ahead, or in my direction. Realising that I probably had very little to do with the rejections did make me feel better. 

2. No Matter How Much You Wanted It- Knowing It Can’t Have Been Meant To Be

It’s hard to think sometimes that it wasn’t meant to be. One of my rejections was based around a house renovation campaign, and I was SO excited about it. It would have meant working with a DIY brand on a room in our house that needs working on so desperately. The opportunity kind of came out nowhere and it was perfect (or so I thought.)

However when I got the ‘oh we’ve decided to not work with you on this’ message, I was deflated. My visions of marble bathroom tiles went down the drain quite literally, and I felt like deleting my bathroom inspo Pinterest board. (Which oh my god does sound a bit pathetic, but god I was just really excited about it and was really bummed when I was told it wasn’t as I was kind of led to believe we were ready to proceed with things!)

But after having a few DM’s with the lovely Victoria and chatting to Henry, they both made me realise that although I thought this opportunity was perfect, it clearly wasn’t meant to be.

Victoria said that maybe I’d of never got paid, maybe the client would be a nightmare to work with; there clearly was a reason of why it wasn’t meant to be. Henry and I discussed how it probably would have been a massive stress to have had a bathroom renovation done in the lead up to our Canada holiday, and how we probably couldn’t really afford it right now.

It made me realise that ‘okay this clearly wasn’t the right time after all’ and that made me feel so much better about the initial rejection. I guess sometimes rejections can be blessings in disguise, but that can be really hard to see sometimes!

3. To Stay Positive – When One Door Closes Another Opens…

It can be easy to get deflated by rejections, but there is that famous quote about doors, and I guess that sometimes it is true.

You have to stay positive and keep working towards those goals, something else good will happen and you’ll think ‘I’m so glad that other thing didn’t happen’.

Maybe you got rejected because it means something else is due to come together, or maybe it’s a sign to do something else.

For example, for months I’ve been thinking about changing my hair, and I’ve been umming and ahhing, and then the past month, I’ve had two hair deals fall through. Is this the universe telling me that the hair change is a good thing maybe?

4. Use The Rejection As Motivation

Although it’s so hard to pick yourself back up again, a good way to do this is to use that rejection as motivation.

Use it as motivation in the fact that one day, that brand will kick themselves for not working with you, and an even better and bigger brand will come knocking on your door. Use it as motivation to work harder and achieve those goals.

Don’t let one knock back, hold you back, don’t let whoever gave you that rejection have that power over you.

5. Know That Wasn’t Your Only Shot

Sometimes it can seem like that perfect opportunity, was the only opportunity of that kind, but trust me it is not.

I’m sure a similar or even better opportunity will come along the corner.

There’s no rule in life that you are only presented with opportunities once, so don’t believe that was your only shot.

6. Don’t Dwell

My final point, is to not dwell on the rejection. It can be easy to go through everything over and over, and I even looked up who had a got a campaign that I’d been rejected for, which is always a slippery slope. I gained some perspective and thought of all I have and the things I am working on, rather than just focusing on what I’m not working on. 

In the end I found the best thing to do was just move on. Accept it wasn’t happening and that was it.

A couple of weeks later and I’m not too bothered anymore, I’m already looking onwards and upwards, and out of my funk so that’s good.

I really hope these tips help if you’ve dealt with rejection recently, of course mine is related to work and brands, but this can be applied to many things.

I’d love to know if you have any tips for dealing with rejection?

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